In my dreams I had planned on going to the 2010 Anusara ™ Advanced Intensive in LA. The last time that I was able to gather with the kula was in February 2008 for this same event. During that Intensive I intuited that I was pregnant, and I was, 3 weeks pregnant to be exact. It has been the blessing of my daughter and new family (plus all sorts of other *cough-finances* logistics) that has kept me from traveling. The reality of my life now is that I simply cannot fly across the country to study. I can barely make it to a public yoga class in town!
And gosh darn it, it’s crazy frustrating.
I cannot say that I was not disappointed that I was unable to attend the Advanced Intensive. I also cannot say that I didn’t have feelings of jealousy and *gulp* guilt, yep, I said it, guilt, for not being able to make it. I felt within me that I had let myself down and John down. I know that there are plenty of members of the kula that travel with their babies and family and I seriously wonder “how in God’s name are they able to do that?”. These feelings of jealousy and guilt are unfounded, I know that, and of course this was an opportunity to be a ‘grown up’ and embody the teachings and so I hunkered down, looked at myself square in the Heart and addressed these feelings. And lo and behold, sweetness flowed.
3 Ways to be Anusara when Away from the Kula
Adhikara (studentship) ★ I can step wholeheartedly into my studies *again*, all my past teacher training notes, the Anusara ™ Teacher Manual, handouts that John has passed out during past workshops, etc. I have a lot of inspiration and teachings. It’s just easier to step into all of that when you have hundreds of like hearted and like minded folks blasting off energy to each other! 😉 Part of this studying is also observing the expression of the kula via social media. There are plenty of teeny bits of wisdom being tweeted and Facebooked and blogged and Twitpicd. In fact a hashtag has been created just for the Intensive #AdvLa and #AdvINT 😀
Honor ★ I can honor my kula, all my teachers that have inspired me in this path, especially John by teaching in a way that reflects the clarity and authenticity of my heart and the larger vision. I can choose to continue to always do my best and be my best in any and all circumstances. I may not be able to see my teacher face to face. I may not be able to even contact him in a way that shows him who I am as a teacher. I can continue to cultivate goodness and authenticity and enhance life. I hope that this energy may travel through time and space and perhaps tap my teacher on his shoulder The rest of this week’s classes will be in honor of the beautiful gathering happening in the West Coast right now!
Open To Grace ★ Being the 1st principle of Anusara Yoga ™ I say this all the time. This teaching has shifted and changed for me since I began my studies 9 years ago. Now it’s about letting go of expectations, and especially any limitations that I place on myself in a different way. It’s all about softening to feel me, as a mother and the yoga that is my daily life with my daughter. I am not *just* me. I am my family as much as I am myself. Before I choose to act, before I ‘make plans’ I must soften and align with the Divine energy that is now embodied clearly in my family. If I soften I can see the abundance, if I harden and choose in disconnection, I will be disappointed and will cultivate dis-ease in my Heart. I will continue to work toward studying with John again as soon as I can, but at the same time I must stay open and ebb and flow with the currents of embodied Grace of my family.
I do believe that my longing to be near the kula and study with my teacher is not an isolated feeling that only I have. I think that there may be quite a few of you that feel the same way that I do. In what ways do you, that are unable to travel and connect with your teachers or teachings, take action with respect to this issue? In what way are you shifting yourself to make your actions exemplary?
Please share!!! Add light and it will help us all become brighter 😀
These 3 things are not something you do only when the Advanced Intensive is going on 😉 *duh* But we are certainly forced to bring more meaning and more value to them when we feel disconnected 😉