When The World Doesn’t See You As You See Yourself

You know how you feel inside?

All the good stuff, I’m talking about: your dreams, the vision of who you are in the world, your passions, all that stuff that totally fires you up!

I’ve been thinking about that a lot lately. How that inner brilliance translates to the outside world, and whether it does translate to the outside world.

I am an introvert.

I tend to have all these dreams inside of me.

In my head.

I do reflect them out to the world in a focused ways, laser sharp, via the media that I publish as well as my presence in social media.

I’m big on evoking mechanisms, the ones that help you feel: words, sounds, images (and if you happen to be physically with me in class, touch.)

Full transparency, I tend to live in my head a lot. My brain is my hiding place. It’s were I go to be me.

This has been the case all of my life. Now it’s more prevalent, as the living space that we have does not have any physical separations at all. It’s just one very large loft.

I pick and choose when what’s inside comes out.

I don’t know about you, but it takes me time to let go and allow myself to play.

That is a bit of a problem at times.

My daughter took a picture of me the other day. She’s really taken to taking pictures, after seeing me obsessively using my iPhone to capture them at every turn 😉

The picture that she took is a good picture. It’s quite lovely actually.

But it’s not how I see myself.

What she captured is how she sees me and in no way shape or form does it reflect how I see myself, how I think the world sees me and possibly how I want my daughter to see me.

Although the image did in fact capture me, it captured a woman that I didn’t quite recognize and not at all the image with which I am most familiar.

This woman was much calmer, more put together, grounded, serious and not what I would refer to as fun. More “prim and proper”.

And did I already mention serious?

😉

None of the adjectives or qualities that I mentioned before are bad or negative and the “prim and proper” words, I chose…

…They are just not what I envisioned myself being in the world, the reality of what I was putting out into the world.

Seeing myself as my daughter sees me has been a huge teaching, perhaps one of the most powerful ones

I have learned:

• There is a lot more to me than I believed.
• However clear I am about myself on the inside it doesn’t necessarily get out to the outside.
• What people see in us is ‘true,’ how we see ourselves inside is equally ‘true.’

How does this apply to my yoga and the way I live it?

It’s once again brought the depth of the being in the world, the act of being embodied, to the forefront.

Practicing our yoga, whether it be through asana, pranayama, meditation, walking, cooking, parenting or any any other form that it has taken for you at the moment is 1/2 deep focus and 1/2 pure enjoyment.

Example: your asana practice

1. Focus heavy: you get on your mat and are so gung-ho you don’t let anything disturb you. You are meticulous about how and when you get on the mat. You are committed and consistent but don’t quite enjoy it as much as you did. You do it more because you have to, and you know it’s good for you. You push through, sometimes pushing through a lot of discomfort and pain, but man you get through it!
2. Enjoyment heavy: Your practice is a delight. You adore being in your body, it just feels so yummy! It’s super amazing. You get on your mat and just go, moving organically and blissfully into all that makes your body say “yes!!!” But you are often times distracted, your mind isn’t in it, and often times you loose track of where you were. Oh wait! A text from your BFF! And of all a sudden your practice is done…

This scenario is not only applicable to your asana practice, but to all aspects of your life. I can guarantee that you’ll start to see a pattern emerge, a pattern that is uniquely yours.

I know this has been HUGE for me.

I’ve noticed a disparity between soulful concentration and delight particularly in my parenting. I’m either super focused or spacy….the lightness and play is lacking.

When focus and love get fully integrated in the place in the middle, that profound change and the deep infusion of your entire Essence can be most aligned with your Source and how you choose to live in the world + be seen in the world.

Our life necessitates deep engagement and it comes in the simple package of focus and love.

I cannot tell you how immensely grateful I am for having the opportunity to study with the finest teachers in the world Hunter Rose 4.5 yrs old and Mae Anne 22 months.

May you shine within as you shine without.

PS. I’m creating a mentoring yoga-life program, incorporating ayurveda, asana, and simple in-the-world practices to sweetly upgrade your life. Divine Moxie all the way baby! Stay on the list to know more…Or get on the list…

PPS. I have a new episode of Elsie’s Yoga Class who’s theme is this exact topic!!!! Be on the lookout in the next couple of days!!!!

Tagged as: #spiritualgangster, #yogaeverydamnday, dive deep, living your yoga, Yoga Advice, yoga is life